She Turns Her Tears to Diamonds for Her Crown
by mazikeenpendragon
Summary: The image of the breathing tube was seared in her brain. Twoshot
1. Chapter 1

**She Turns Her Tears to Diamonds For Her Crown**

**Summary: The image of the breathing tube was seared in her brain.**

**Sequel to God Save the Prom Queen, Just Another Dressed Up Heartbreak, and She'd Trade It All for A Heart That's Whole.**

**Twoshot. The second part will be about Carly and Joss discussing things.**

Cam groaned as he was awakened by quiet whimpers. He turned in the bed to see Josslyn beside of him, Trina on the girl's other side. After they'd met up with her at the hospital that morning upon finding out about Oscar, they'd come back here with she and her mother. Josslyn had clung to both of their hands desperately and neither could bear to part with her. They'd managed to help Carly keep Josslyn's mind off of what was going on with Oscar as best as they could and when it came night time, they'd all went to Josslyn's.

Cam threw Trina a pained look and gently reached out to shake Josslyn awake. "Joss. Joss, come on. You're having a nightmare."

Josslyn shot up with a cry and he caught her by the shoulders. She wilted against him in exhaustion, tears spilling from lovely blue eyes.

Trina moved in closer so that she and Josslyn's shoulders touched. "Josslyn? Are you okay?"

The blonde calmed a bit, raising her knees up under her chin, she wrapped her arms around them. "I'm okay. Sorry for waking you guys." She told them apologetically, sounding a bit breathless.

The other girl shook her head negatively, dark eyes wide. "Don't apologize. Everyone has nightmares. There's no shame in that."

Josslyn nodded and swallowed hard. "I just keep seeing Oscar with the tubes in his throat. I don't think I'll ever be able to get that out of my mind. It hurts to know that he can't even breathe on his own, now."

"It must've been terrifying." Cam murmured. He'd peered through the window of Oscar's room and it had been hard to see him hooked up to all of those machines. He couldn't imagine being in Josslyn's position and seeing it happen. His heart also ached for Oscar who he's sure never wanted Josslyn to have to see him like that.

"It was. The evening was going so good, too. You asked why we were at the courthouse. It was because we were trying to get a marriage certificate." Josslyn laughed. It sounded brittle even to her own ears. "I mean, I _know _that it sounds stupid, but Oscar wanted to experience everything he's going to miss out on. We were turned down, told to come back when we were older. So we kind of had our own ceremony. We went to our bridge where we'd first kissed and he gave me his lock from his locker. I locked it on the bridge and everything like the bridge in Paris. And he gave me a digital watch, telling me when it went to 11:11, he'd be thinking of me. He had just started the song I sang at the Nurses' Ball and we were dancing when he suddenly collapsed in my arms. I was so scared and he _wouldn't wake up."_ Her voice was frantic and her breathing was ragged, eyes blown wide.

Trina's arm rubbed her back gently. "You don't need to talk anymore." She whispered gently. "Just calm down a bit, okay?"

Josslyn buried her head in Trina's shoulder. "I'm scared to even close my eyes, though." Her voice was muffled against her friend's slim shoulder. "Every single time I close my eyes, I see him and I can't even help him."

"You're not alone though, Josslyn." Cam finally said. "Trina are both here and we'll wake you up if you start having nightmares again. Besides, you aren't doing any good for Oscar by not sleeping. He'd want you to get some rest." He knew it was a low blow to use Oscar this way but it was one way to ensure that Josslyn would actually go back to sleep.

The girl in question gulped, calming down a bit as she laid on the bed and Cam and Trina laid down as well. "Thank you two for being here for me." She whispered quietly, eyes fluttering shut.

* * *

The next morning while Josslyn was in the shower, Trina and Cam took a seat at the counter in the kitchen while Carly busied herself with getting them coffee and orange juice.

"So," The woman said casually, pouring herself some juice. "How did my daughter sleep last night?"

It was clear to both of the teens that she was fishing for information, clearly worried about Josslyn.

"She had a nightmare last night." Trina answered truthfully. "About Oscar on the breathing tube. Cam and I got her to calm down and she told us about how scary it was. We got her to go back to sleep, though."

"I figured." Carly mumbled with a nod. "I know the fact that he needs to be on that damn thing. Thanks for being there for her, you two. It makes me feel good to know that you both care about her so much."

"Of course, Mrs. Corinthos." Cam answered, feeling overcome with emotion.

The three of them didn't speak much after that as they waited for Josslyn to come downstairs so they could go to the hospital. They all just promised themselves that they'd be there for the girl.


	2. Chapter 2

**She Turns Her Tears to Diamonds For Her Crown **

**Part Two**

Carly didn't get to talk to her daughter about what Cam and Trina had told her, having to immediately take the three teens to the hospital to check on Oscar. She promised herself that she'd talk to her when they got home, though.

As soon as they walked into the hospital and to the floor Oscar was on though, she knew something was up. She'd known it from the moment she'd seen Elizabeth in the nurses' station with a pained expression. The woman had hurried over to them and wrapped her arms tightly around her son like someone who was grateful for their luck would do. She'd heard her daughter suck in a breath from behind her and cling to Trina as that thought seemed to strike her as well. Kim and Drew were clinging to eachother in front of the hospital room and from what Carly could tell, Drew was the only thing holding Kim up. Her heart dropped into her chest at the sight. This wasn't good.

"Kim? Drew?" Carly asked, voice soft.

Kim pulled away from Drew at that, face pale and pinched. "Oscar has no brain activity."

A strangled sob escaped Josslyn's lips from behind her.

Carly steeled herself and turned to look at her daughter who stood between Cam and Trina. All three kids looked pale and distraught.

Josslyn stepped forward and embraced Kim and then Drew before pulling away. "Can I see him?" She whispered.

Kim nodded and swiped at her tears, watching the girl go into Oscar's hospital room.

* * *

Josslyn sat down and reached out a shaky hand to take Oscar's in her own. She stifled a sob as she looked at him. She could tell that he wasn't there. It wasn't just that Kim had told her that he was brain dead. She genuinely couldn't feel his spirit. "Hey Oscar. I know you aren't in there. Not really. But I still want you to know how much I love you and how happy you made me. I wish we had more time, but I guess at least you aren't suffering anymore. I don't think I'll ever forget you and even if I fall in love again, there will never be another you. You're one of a kind. You were and are my first love. You know, I was thinking of it and..I'm guessing you knew something was up. You were so withdrawn in Charlie's the other night. And you gave me the watch and your lock. It feels like you were giving me clues. I think I suspected it, too. I just...didn't want to believe it. I should go. Cam and Trina are here and I'm sure they'd both like to say goodbye, too." She stood and leaned down to kiss his forehead, tears spilling onto his face as she straightened and headed out of the room.

As soon as she was in the hallway again, Kim reached out to take her hands, squeezing them lightly. "Thank you for loving my son, Josslyn." She whispered tearfully. "I feel like you made my little boy live longer. You made it easier." She pulled back and cleared her throat, reaching into her purse and producing a small, wrapped box with her name on it. "I found this in Oscar's room last night. He must've been planning to give it to you at some point."

Josslyn took it in her trembling hands, breath caught in her throat. She had a feeling that she knew what it was with the joke Oscar had made on the bridge about the digital watch not being a ring. She took the wrapping paper off carefully and opened the box, staring down at a pretty, silver ring with an opal-Oscar's birthstone in it. She took it from the box, feeling her mother and two best friend's behind her as she slipped it on her finger. It shone as it caught the light and it caused an overwhelming ache in her chest. She wondered how long he'd had it sitting around for and when he'd planned on giving it to her. She felt the comforting squeeze on her arm from Cam as he and Trina went in to say goodbye to Oscar. She couldn't take her eyes off of the ring.

* * *

Carly and Josslyn entered the house a couple of hours later, both feeling tearful and exhausted. Carly sighed and pulled her daughter over to the sofa and took her hands. "Cam and Trina told me about your nightmares." She swallowed hard. "I'm so sorry you've had to go through what you have. If I could, I'd take that pain from you."

Josslyn shook her head. "It was hard to see Oscar so helpless." She practically whispered, drawing her legs up to wrap her arms around them and rest her chin on her knees.

Her mother reached out to stroke her hair gently. "I can imagine. Josslyn, in the hospital when Oscar was first brought in, you told me you had to say you loved him one last time. It hit me then why you'd say that."

The teen froze at that. She didn't say anything. _Couldn't _find the words.

"It's because you never got to say it to Morgan, isn't it?" Carly's voice is careful and soft, not wanting to upset her daughter farther. She knew how hard things were. Especially since Morgan's body had never been found. There was a lack of closure in that.

Josslyn bit her lip and then nodded. "Cam and Trina told me that Morgan knew I loved him. That there was no way he could possibly doubt that. Still, I _needed _to be sure Oscar knew."

Carly wrapped her daughter in a hug and rested her chin on her daughter's head. "If you have that nightmare again, Josslyn, I want you to come to me, okay? And maybe we can see about a therapist? I feel like you should've been to see one before now." When she thought about it, Carly was positive her little girl should've been in therapy after the whole Nelle debacle or even after Morgan's death. Josslyn was too stubborn for her own good and tried so hard to be strong, even if it was a detriment to her.

Her daughter nodded in agreement. "Okay." She replied in a hushed tone, leaning into her mother more.


	3. Chapter 3

**She Turns Her Tears to Diamonds For Her Crown**

**Summary: Josslyn goes to Carly about her nightmares.**

**Part Three**

Carly awakened to her bedroom door opening. Sonny was busy that night, trying to get Kristina out of the mob and Avery was spending the night with her mother so she knew that it was Josslyn. She reached out to turn on the lamp by her bedside and saw her daughter standing in front of the bed, illuminated by the light. "Honey? Did you have a nightmare?"

Josslyn bit her lip and nodded before walking closer to the bed and climbing on. There were tear streaks on her face and her hair was in disarry, bottom lip trembling. "I just keep seeing him with the breathing tube and I keep seeing him collapse at our bridge and I can't erase it from my mind."

Carly reached out for her daughter's hands, alarmed by how much they shook. "Oh god, Josslyn. I'm so sorry."

Her daughter threw her arms around her and burrowed her face into her neck, sob escaping her lips.

The older woman closed her eyes and hugged her daughter protectively, wishing not for the first time that she could take away her little girl's pain. "Do you want to sleep in here, tonight?" She questioned gently.

Josslyn pulled away and nodded, crawling under the covers. Her ring glimmered on her hand and she bit her lip, thoughtful expression on her face. "Oscar and I went to try and get a marriage license." She said it so quickly that she needed to repeat herself so her mother understood her.

Carly gave her daughter a stunned look. "What?" She eyed the ring her daughter twisted on her finger.

"I know it sounds stupid and I know it's probably wrong that he and I didn't come to you, Drew, or Kim. But...Oscar...he was never going to get married or anything and I wanted him to experience that. We were told to come back in a few years, though so we couldn't do that. I'm guessing that was why Oscar had this ring hidden in his room." Josslyn told her mother.

Her mom bit her lip. "I can't say that I'm happy that you didn't come to me, but I can understand your actions. Is that why you two were on the bridge?"

Josslyn nodded. "And then he collapsed in front of me."

Carly sighed and brushed the hair from her daughter's forehead, pressing a kiss to it. "I'm sorry that happened to you. If I could take away your pain, I would. I know that I've said it before, but it's still true. You shouldn't have had to go through this and Oscar shouldn't have had to either."

The teen swallowed hard and shook her head. "I'm just so terrified to ever go back to that bridge. It feels like the memory of our first kiss is tarnished by what happened."

"What happened cannot take away your memories of Oscar. Even if you can't ever go to that bridge again, you still have those. And Oscar...I think he'd want you to be happy. He loved you so much, Josslyn. Anyone with eyes could see that." The older woman told the teen firmly.

Josslyn's lips quirked into a small, sad smile."You're right, mom. I mean, when he was in the hospital in Niagra Falls, he told me that he wanted me to smile and that he loved my laugh. I'm just happy that Oscar isn't suffering anymore. I know him and he wouldn't have wanted to be hooked up to all of those tubes and wires. I just wish that we'd had more time. I wish Oscar had never been sick in the first place. Or he'd known he was sick from the beginning. Maybe that would've made everything...easier."

Carly held back her tears and then asked. "Do you want to try and get some sleep now, Joss? I'll be right here if you have a nightmare again." She felt Josslyn nod against her shoulder and let the girl go so she could lie down. She watched as pure exhaustion seemed to take over her daughter as the girl fell asleep not ten minutes later.

It took longer for Carly to fall asleep, mind flitting over all the things Josslyn had told her. She was going to be there for her little girl, no matter what.


End file.
